it's over. sigh. i'm really sorry but i'm more sad than happy that it's over. felt so saddened yesterday when i was thinking of how it was going to end today. today, it's a reality. guess there was a little sense of nostalgia when it all ended. last day of being a tjcian. no more school uniform. no more tutorials. no more consultations with tutors. no more routine lifestyle. nothing. somehow i wished the As never had to come to an end. didn't want to walk out that gate. omg. just like that two years had passed me by. honestly i have quite a lot of regrets. why didn't i treasure tj more when i was in it. only liked it a lot after handing over everything. when the studying times began. why did i let my tutors down for so long. suddenly i feel that it's so unfair. my studies never made it to my top priority. it was always something else. all the time i never realised that my actions had consequences on so many other people. i guess when i look back, i think for the first one and a half years i failed as a student. it was only the build up to prelims that i started wondering... what in the world i had been doing the past one and a half years not studying when obviously when you're a student in a school, the main purpose is for studies. but i'm lucky. lucky to have tutors who went all the way for me. they were more concerned for me than i was for myself. i really don't think i deserved such great tutors. i only wished i hadn't failed them or worried them for such a long period of time. if only... if only i had a chance to turn that around.

realised that my tutors really became my source of intrinsic motivation for the As whenever i felt as if that's it no matter what i do it isn't going to work. i never wanted to fail them again. wanted quite badly to make this my last chance to make it up to them with my As work. though i know that i'll never be able to make it up to them fully. sigh. but it was better than none. guess it's a bit weird to say this but yes i like the routine lifestyle of the As. the everyday wake up eat read the newspapers attempt to study go back to sleep wake up eat attempt to study again eat another attempt at studying sleep and then it's the next day (slack away time which constitutes majority of the time spent it obviously not included) . somewhat routine. pretty nice and slack. really glad to put on the tj uni before heading to sch for the examinations. i am so lucky to have gotten into this school by chance.

anyway after the bio paper i was so excited heading to the staffroom. really really felt like talking to my bio tutor. hadn't seen her since the As started. at least i saw mr ho during the As la. and when i got there i realised that my bio tutor was not in school. super super sad. ahh help. i'm so glad we've to go back on the 29th to collect our testimonials. if not i'd probably die from the tj-withdrawal symptoms or something. i guess at least i learnt to treasure things more and not to take anything for granted yeah. sigh.















looked so sad before the chem paper. suddenly so empty... suddenly so....















and they said time flies. it couldn't be more true















last official day of school with our ct. i love that green uniform

random pictures. you know... i really would beg if i could have just one more day in my class to have tutorials with my tutorials completely done, to be paying attention for all the lectures and to be talking to my tutors still as a student. haha i'm so sorry i think half the world would probably be thinking i've gone mad by now. tj withdrawal symptoms. anyway i really miss my notes already. especially my bio notes. omg. sigh. tj was great. the tutors the pple the environment. ahh okay okay i'll be back to tj in 5 days time... 5 days... can't wait. sense my excitement? haha okay i'm really nuts already -abrupt ending-

one more week... one more week to rendezvous with my dear bio. pretty nice to start and end the as proper with bio i guess. need to spend some private time with my dear bio option... it's a race against time to monday. and i'm losing. no no. i promised before never to give up. and i won't. cannot cannot let it go wrong. yups. don't know if it's a good thing to end the As but yeah. till next thursday... i've got a special date with biology =)