everytime i see the fire coming from the island near me...
my heart drops.
i just want the best for you.

haha and over dinner today...
we were trying to recall when we first started dating before we went official.
anddd we cant recall. haha think it was too long before lol =p

anyway dinner was great!
Ricciotti Pizza Pasta & Deli! =p
italian foodfare along singapore river ftw! =D

Antipasto Riccioti

some pretty good chardonay

Tagliomini with Scallops in Spicy Tomato Sauce

Red Snapper Cooked Acqua Pazza Style with Prawns, Capers, Olive & Herbs

Tiramisu

awesomeee dinner. the pictures don't do enough justice. the food was impressive =D

watched "when in rome" as well.
pretty good show! had a good laugh =D

and it's an early 15th month celebration =D
15th out of the many more to come <3

今天很难过
昨天也是很难过
明天也是会很难过
天天都很难过

and i think a part of me just died when i heard that

i have no motivation to graduate anymore.
there's just nothing to look forward to anymore.
no reason to work to hard.
to choing my studies anymore.
there's nothing at the finish line.
nothing i want waiting for me anymore.

i don't want to go there just because everyone's going there.

i want to go there because i've always dreamt of doing it.
to graduate from a university, take a couple of weeks and backpack europe.
backpack europe.
sounds silly but
i already wanted that even before i entered university

i'm not angry. i'm not anything.
it's just a little hard when this is something i've dreamt of for like half my life.
i just need a little space. a little time.

now everything just feels kind of.
empty.

it's amazing how it makes my day just seeing you smile into the screen =)
<3

hey apple.

hey apple.

hey apple.

NOTHING!

HAHAHAHAHAA

hey apple.

hey apple.

hey apple.

HAHAHAHA i'm sooo addicted to annoying orange.

its so irritatingly funny.

and funnily irritating

and irritatingly funny.

and funnily irritating.

hahahahahaha OMG.

in the unfamiliar crowd, you're the only face i wanna see.

after a day at work,

seeing you just for that 5 minutes or so

feels like the best thing in the world =)

that look on your face

and that warm embrace

makes everything feel better again

i could live in this forever =)

hehe yeah! another great day with you! =D

alice in wonderland is not too bad! pretty good! =)

but if i were a kid, i'd cry after watching it.

all the pretty and cute little characters in that fairytale land that you're been reading about

all suddenly transformed into evil looking creatures with morbid scenes of alice in the wonderland

total nightmare for the kids (hence the very important PG sign)

haha anyway I still wanna get the cute forever friends bear mug =D

when i see it wahaha =p

ps: i hate e-learning week haha =(

okie. i think i've cooled down.
mood swinging these couple of days.
i always blog only when i'm fiesty. heh.
but i still do mean what i write. just in a less fiesty feel.

i mean it's not all bad.
i still appreciate it when you always remember to buy me sth to eat and drop it at my seat before night class starts cos you know i've no time to grab anything to eat,
when you brought me to see the doc and took care of me when i wasn't feeling well
even the smallest thing like your early morning good morning messages or spot checks to see if i've left hall so that i won't be late for work.
even the smile you give me when you look me in the eyes.
they really do make my day =)

i know i'm not very good at expressing how i feel.
i always keep things inside. keep you guessing.
so i write them down for now
it's just the littlest things which trouble me at times.
but it's a start. i'll keep learning. and trying not to keep you in the dark.
thank you though for listening me out,
for everything you've done for me too
and of course for loving me =)
<3

so many different feelings which i can never put into words.

guess that's why i always keep them in.

guess i've put off writting this for a long time already.

but i guess it just hit me harder than usual today.

even the simplest things. like walking me back to kr from biz after class. thats like what. across the road? not even a 5 mins walk. it's a waste of time. it can't be done.

from central lib back to hall. don't want to walk me back cos it's a waste of time too? fine.

even if you wanted to cab back from there. after accompanying you, it wouldn't hurt to ask the uncle to just drop me off at kr before heading back right? it wouldn't even take 5 mins of the uncle's driving time/your driving time.

you'd rather let me walk back alone at night.

the 5 mins which you'd probably spend watching tv. sitting. stoning. chatting. i don't know what else.

you know. i meant every word when i said you'd never send me back if i was going home home.

this is the reason why i'm so confident about that.

it's not about the sending back.

it's about everything else. everything else that you don't see.

especially when i try so hard.

you know whenever i know i'm going to be a little late to meet you.

i'll cab down cos that few mins i could save to spend with you was that important to me.

how i will plan my schedule or even cancel/rearrange timings/put on hold gatherings just because i know i have a chance of spending that little bit of time with you.

you have no idea.

i guess after everything.

it just hurts to know that i'm not even worth 5 minutes of your time.

not even 5 minutes.

i'm that insignificant.

but you will never understand.

a little bit sad.

a little bit disappointed.

don't really know what to feel for now.

but it's okay. i'll survive.

that's life. i guess.